Torn Between the Two

It is difficult living in two worlds. On the one hand, I am excited about coming home. I miss many people there, especially my wife, children, grandchildren and other family. With three more grandbabies, two girls and a?, soon to enter the world, I can hardly wait. I miss my friends who were an important part of my life. I miss the Stateline area. I am excited to be returning.

It is also exciting because in doing so; we face some formidable and difficult challenges. At this moment, nothing is settled, set up or in place. The target date for leaving here looks like the end of March. That is only about six weeks. I am excited because there is a certainty and expectancy in me for how God is going to overcome and bring success to the situation. There will be a great testimony.

On the other hand, I am very excited about what has been happening here. My “American-ness” has opened many doors to share a message I strongly believe is the key to a great move of God at least here in Mexico. Being white attaches an instant credibility and acceptance. How wise can it be to invite someone to preach in your church that you hardly know? It is really unwise, but it is what it is.

For me it is an almost terrifying experience not because I am afraid to speak or lack sufficient Spanish, but because of the immense responsibility it entails. The thing I never want to do is mislead or misdirect even a single person. Within less than a week, I will have spoken in three different churches. I hope that I am not being disobedient by purposely being shy about exposing myself to more opportunities.  

In addition, the warmth and generosity of the people who have become a part of my life here will be deeply missed. It is impossible to describe it to you in a way that you could understand within the context of the American culture. I am very sad to be leaving. However, it will have been one of the most exceptional years of my life.

All in all this past week was filled with activity. I’m a little tired and over-stuffed with food but otherwise good. The next three days are planned to be busy ones. I do have to say that I may never want to eat fish again once I return. It is not that I have eaten too much. To the contrary, after eating fish so fresh that it is cooked and on your plate less than an hour since it was swimming in the ocean will be tough to match.