Hard Choices

Life! Sometimes it is like riding a high-speed rollercoaster in the dark. It can be a thrilling and exciting ride or it can be a terrifying experience. Sometimes the journey takes unexpected turns and sometimes the bottom seems to drop out before it goes back up. As little Much Afraid learned in Hinds’ Feet on High Places[1], it doesn’t always follow the path we would choose.

As much as we would like it to be otherwise, most of life is beyond our control. In reality, about the only thing that we are able to control is our reaction and response to the circumstances which life throws at us. And we have been given the freedom to make choices, countless choices every day about how we live. Many of them are conscious choices. Many are not. Either way, we will deal with the consequences, good or bad, of those choices.

In an isolated world, solely our choices and the forces of nature would govern our lives. Nevertheless, as much as we would like to be in control of our own lives, we live in a world populated by other people. Not only do they want to be in control of their own lives, sometimes they want to control ours as well. Very often, it happens that we wind up reaping the consequences of someone else’s choices. It is not always fair.

There will be disappointments and sorrows in life and there will be pain and suffering. These can be either friends and guides which help to lead us forward or they will be enemies which destroy us. We can choose to allow them to build and strengthen our faith and trust in God or we can choose to allow them to destroy us with bitterness and hatred.

As it did for little Much Afraid, the path will not always lead in the direction we would choose. At times, it will seem to lead away from where we believe it should go. This is my position now. I do not want to leave Mexico at this time. I have friends here and I will miss them. There is more ministry opportunity here than three of me could handle. I like it here. I love the people, the food, the climate and the beauty of nature. I can choose to stay. It is my right. However, is it right? It comes down to a question of trust. I can chose to follow the Great Shepherd and to trust Him by doing things His way or I can choose to follow my own way.

At this time, I believe that returning home is the right thing to do. All that remains is to determine the timing. In the natural world, it doesn’t look promising. I am returning at age 61 to no job in a poor economy with nothing to fall back on. However, I also know that none of this came as a surprise to God. I believe that He has already provided the solutions. I expect to be able to give a significant testimony to His goodness when this is settled.  

 Life is an interesting journey. I am sad over what is happening but I am also excited because I am trusting God to be faithful to His promises. I am excited to see how this plays out. The difference between trusting God and trusting self is what determines whether the ride is exciting or terrifying. I prefer exciting.

(If you have never read Hinds' Feet, I highly recommend it. The principles taught have helped me many times in my life.)

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[1] Hinds’ Feet on High Places – Hannah Hurnard

Another Good Week

This past week was about as routine as routine could be expected here. There were only a few surprises. All of my English class obligations were met and I was blessed to be able to restart classes with the doctor at the Red Cross. The new “phrases only” class at the union hall was a lot of fun.

It was warm and sunny every day with a nice breeze. Sorry!! Be consoled though, I didn’t make it to the beach again. I didn’t get this posted on Sunday as usual because I got home from morning service and felt the need for a nap. I didn’t wake up until it was almost time to head back to town for the evening service.

I was able to make it to church services five times this week between four different churches. I preached for the second week in a row at the Sunday night service in pastor Solomón’s church. It was a bit of a challenge because Arturo, my faithful translator, was not able to make it at the last minute. I had to deliver the message entirely in Spanish. I was thankful that something had moved me to run through the translation several times. I stumbled only a couple of times over longer words. Spanish is easier to get right because every letter in a word (except h) makes a sound and almost all letters have only one sound. My Spanish is getting better thanks to not having too many English speakers to engage in conversation.

I asked the congregation several times during the message if they were still with me. They said they were. I seemed to have their close attention. I think it was because they had to be paying attention to be able to follow my Spanish. I was also delivering a message that might have seemed a bit contrary to what they usually hear. I was telling them to stop trying to be obedient. Legalistic thinking is deeply rooted here. Or maybe it is just more transparent and less sugar-coated than back home.

I wanted to make the point that grace and law do not mix. You cannot patch the law with grace and you cannot contain the new wine of grace within the constraints of the law. The New Covenant did not arise to repair or supplement the Old Covenant. It came as a replacement. I told them to stop wasting their effort trying to be obedient and to start using it to love Jesus. If we love Jesus, we will be obedient because of that love rather than out of obligation. It works!

This week promises to be a busy one. I am going to a mission on Wednesday with the pastors from Monte de Dios, the recovery ministry. Thursday is a pastor’s conference. I have a meal invite for Friday and on Sunday, I will be going in the morning to a mission with another small church which is near my apartment. Tuesday night, Wednesday night and Thursday night services plus the regular classes should ward off any boredom.

Since it now looks certain that Donna will not be returning to Mexico, I will have to leave as well. Besides the fact that it would not be right for us to be separated, such an arrangement would not play well in the culture here. Although those closest to me here understand the situation and are urging me to stay, the best thing will be to come home. I will be looking for employment. I really want to continue in ministry, but I am trusting in God for both guidance and provision. I am daily seeking God’s will in the matter and I would appreciate your prayers.

What's to eat?

How much can one person eat? I might be on my way (unwillingly) to finding out. Since Donna has been back in the States, I have been invited numerous times for meals. I think I have forgotten what hunger feels like. One particular day this past week, I had breakfast, lunch twice and dinner.

I am not complaining by any means. In the first place, it is heartwarming to know that so many people genuinely care. The friends who have become a part of my life will make leaving a very sad time. A piece of my heart will remain here with them.

I am also not complaining because I love the food here. Oaxaca-style is the best. I’m sure there must have been something I didn’t like, but I can’t remember what it was. As long as it contains the Mexican vitamin, Vitamin “T” I’m all for it. For those not familiar with vitamin T, it is Tortillas, Tacos, Tlyudas, Tostadas, Tamales, Tortas and Totopos. Add some fresh hot salsa, a pitcher of Jamaica (hibiscus) water and I am all set. Also, the Mole (mo-lay), a type of gravy, is incredible and the seafood is the best. HMMMM? Is that hunger I feel?

I never found the time to be bored this week. I went to church four times throughout the week and preached for the first time in Spanish without a translator at one of the services. I only stumbled a couple of times.

I didn’t make it to the beach again, but I did spend a lot of time in the main town park. It is a great way to connect with people and it is a very pleasant environment for reading and studying. I have been spending as little time as possible alone in the apartment. Although I know a lot of people and spend a lot of time with them, it is not the same as being with those closest to you.

My ribs are still very sore. I wound up getting two cortisone shots at the Red Cross. It seemed to help a lot except that it seemed to make me retain water for a few days. I looked the medication up on the internet. I’m not sure, but it looks like it is approved only for veterinary use in the US. That may explain my urge to horse around and sleep standing up.

I am preaching tonight (Sunday) on the topic of submission. I think that submitting is a very difficult thing to do. We all naturally resist being under authority. It is against our (old for Christians) nature. Another word for submission is obedience. Obedience is God’s umbrella of protection. God’s blessings reside under it.

The opposite of submission is rebellion. Another word for rebellion is sin. We rebel against submitting to God’s authority in our lives because we fear letting go of control. We need to have faith enough in God to protect and provide for us that we submit to His instructions. The opposite of faith is fear. We are like the guy who lowered himself into a deep well with a rope he thought was long enough but wasn’t. Unable to climb and fearing the result of the fall, he held on until his strength gave out. Losing his grip on the rope, he fell ----- all of six inches. Let go!

Holidays, A Cracked Rib, Fishing, and Iguana for Lunch

          Well, this was one adventure-filled week. I hardly know where to begin. On Monday, I went fishing with my friend Manólo at Playa Chahue next to the marina. We didn’t use either poles or fishing line. We used 200’+ nets, three in all. My job was to swim straight out from shore with the net. It was in a bag on top of an inner tube which I pulled behind me. Manólo followed deploying the net as we went. We finally ran out of net about 100’ past the safety buoy line.

          After all three nets were set, we settled on the rocks for some excellent conversation. When about three hours had passed, we went to work retrieving the nets. By this time, it was very dark except for a partial moon. All of the nets were filled with fish of various sizes. As we were about finished, I slipped on the rocks and took a sharp blow to my left rib cage. It hurt some, but except for a skinned elbow, there seemed to be no other injury. I thank God that the foot which had slipped into a crevice in the rocks was uninjured. More on this in a minute.

          The next step was getting the fish-laden net bags to the pickup truck and then home. Once there, we set about to remove the fish from the nets. I always thought that you just dumped them to the floor. Hah!!! Each fish had to be individually disentangled. This was no easy task. As they struggle to free themselves, they become thoroughly stuck in the net. As we worked, his wife was busy preparing some of the catch for dinner. De-e-elicious!!!

          The ribs were sore, but I figured it was worth the adventure. It didn’t bother me too much (only when I breathed) until sometime in the middle of the night Friday night. One time when I turned over, I felt a sharp snap followed by an intense pain which did not go away. I went to the Red Cross to see a doctor on Saturday. He examined me, gave me an anti-inflammatory shot and a box of Naproxen. Diagnosis - “probably cracked” rib. The total cost was less than 200 pesos. That is around $14.50. It would have been thousands in the US. I’ll be hurting for awhile. {Insert violin music here}

          Thursday, I was invited to a friend’s house for lunch. On the menu – Iguana. That’s right. I ate Lenny! Well, maybe it wasn’t Lenny, but it was of his relatives. No, it didn't taste at all like chicken. It was quite good actually. The texture was slightly chewy and the flavor was distinctive but good. Wednesday I had partaken of another very traditional, but forbidden local delicacy which must remain unnamed. Chapulines is yet another treat. They are seasoned, fried grasshoppers. They are very tasty, kind of like barbecue potato chips. You just have to pull the legs off the juicy big ones or they get stuck in your throat. The only "bucket list” food left on my list is Tacos de Ojos. (cow eye taco)

          Friday was “El Dia de Reyes” (Three Kings Day). It is the culmination of the Christmas celebration and it is a big holiday. It, rather than Christmas Day, is the big gift-giving day in honor of the gifts brought by the three wise men. One particular custom is the Rosca de Reyes, or King’s Cake. It is round like a crown, but looks like a giant decorated bagel. Hidden inside is a tiny Jesus figure. The person who gets the figure has to host the February 2^nd Candlemas Day celebration. The day ends with a dinner of corn tamales and hot chocolate.

          The week was very busy with many ongoing ministry opportunities. God also seems to have given me a very effective strategy for ministering to Jehovah’s Witnesses. It really messes up their programmed responses. We look at evidence within their own literature which undermines their belief that the organization is God’s sole mouthpiece in the Earth today. We also look at information in their literature which undermines the credibility of the organization. It is more loving and is much more effective than trying to attack their flawed (and ever-changing) doctrines. They are too well trained. They are wonderful people. I hesitate to say it, but they put most Christians to shame with the lives they live.

2011 Ends in Huatulco

Somebody help me. I’m going to get fat! I have lost count of how many times I have been invited to share a meal with someone since Donna left two weeks ago. I’m not complaining because I love the fellowship, but I am forgetting what hunger feels like. I really like the food, but full has become the new normal.

          This past week seemed to just fly by. I had numerous “unplanned” opportunities to share the Gospel, answer questions, and otherwise engage people. I use a method I call “planned spontaneity.” I didn’t invent it, but I have found it to be a very effective way to work. Obviously, planning something and being spontaneous are opposites. The idea is to plan to be alert for opportunities to react spontaneously to open doors. I used to use it as a leadership tool. It is very effective. You just need to train yourself to be expectant and ready to react. This past week was very fruitful.

          The past two weeks have seen the town be very busy with tourists. Mexicans seem to have different vacation customs. They vacation as an extended family. You will often see the grand parents, parents, children of all ages and sometimes aunts and uncles and cousins together. They travel in packs. Or should I say parades. (herds?) A typical group will be walking in town in the evening led by or followed by a very cranky looking dad. (Maybe because he’s paying). The women are talking and usually holding hands as the children run to and fro. The teenagers (if there is more than one) stay just far enough apart from the group so as not to seem to be associated with them. It is interesting to watch. I was too busy to set aside any beach time this week. I would not have enjoyed it anyway because they are beyond crowded.

          I did discover why you are having warmer weather up there right now. One evening I met Jack Frost and his wife Jane. They are vacationing here for the holidays. He is looking forward to returning to work. He said something about having a lot of catching up to do. The weather is very nice here, but it is getting very chilly at night. It has been getting down into the 60’s. Jack?

          I spend New Years Eve in church. I was supposed to preach and I had prepared a nice short message on thanksgiving which I was going to deliver without a translator. I haven’t done that yet. The focus of the evening was to be the meal and fellowship. A pastor friend of Pastor Solomón from the City of Oaxaca showed up unexpectedly and Solomón offered to let him share. Ninety (90) lon-n-ng minutes later, he finished his message. Sadly, most of the people left before the meal because it had gotten so late. This is a custom I call preaching the 3 R’s- Rambling, Ranting and Repeating. It is often delivered without any notes which might restrict the speaker to a more focused message. I fear that it turns more people off to God than it helps.