The past week was my most difficult in Huatulco to date. Monday and Tuesday were holidays for the celebration of Los Dias de los Muertos. (Day(s) of the Dead) It is a huge holiday commemorating the dead. Sacrifices consisting of the favorite foods, treats, and alcohol of the dead relative are placed on an altar with many flowers and candles to guide and welcome them. There are many rituals and traditions dating back thousands of years. It is generally taken very seriously.
Because of the celebrations, most of my English students had cancelled for the week or just did not call or show up. To be fair, this is the common custom in Mexico
Tuesday, I arrived on time for the usual pre-class breakfast at the Red Cross. The doctor, Carmen, met me at the front desk and explained that she was the only one there so she would not be able to be in class. Bummer! I was hungry too. The hotel union was cancelled, so I headed home. I already knew in advance that my Wednesday, in-town classes were cancelled. Add to the list a string of drops, spills, breaks, and mishaps and by evening, I was feeling pretty sorry for myself. Even watching one of my favorite movies, Music Man (Shirley Jones version) didn’t help.
I woke up Wednesday with a bad attitude. I didn’t even shower, shave, or brush my teeth. Pity party doesn’t begin to describe it. My motivation meter was below zero. However, I managed to think just about every negative thought you could imagine. We don’t belong here. We are wasting our time and money being here. We’re not making any difference. I’m not capable or qualified to be doing this. It was an ugly day during which I stayed home (isolated) stirring the pot with both hands. I am glad I neither had any food in the house (by choice) nor felt like going out and facing people. I might have tried to eat myself to happiness. As I write about it now, it doesn’t seem real. I have a good friend here who will scold me when he reads this. I deserve it. The last thing an person in a pity party should do (and the first thing he does) is isolate.
Thursday looked to be more of the same. Fortunately, my daily reading of the Proverbs gave me a sharp wrap on the knuckles. Prov 3:5-6 is my life-guidance, foundational passage. “Trust in the Lord...” Oswald Chambers challenged me even further. In retrospect, I know that it was the Holy Spirit speaking to me when the thought entered my head that I needed to visit a man I haven’t seen in a while. I really didn’t want to go, but I knew I needed to be obedient. I argued with myself to turn back all of the way there.
He is a long-time addict who struggles to stay clean. He has accepted Christ, but guilt and condemnation are still his constant companions. He revealed that he had recently relapsed. He had stopped, but he was still beside himself with shame. As I ministered to him, a boulder dropped out of the sky and landed on my head. I suddenly and clearly realized that, although I was counseling him about his situation, God was counseling me about mine. I have no doubt that God wanted to use me to minister to this man, but He also was using my obedience to minister to me. If I had stayed home….?? God is in control, but He works through our submission.
Friday morning began with a fresh attitude. I had a class at the Red Cross with the doctor. I was able to share more of my personal testimony with her. Afterwards, I went to the town square park to read my Bible. Two young men stopped to talk. They were Jehovah’s Witnesses. One of them was born into it. Normally, they are nearly impossible to reason with. Their training prepares them for virtually every argument using the Bible. However, we had an excellent conversation about the organization. At different points, I felt that he was being touched, that his armor was being pierced. When we finished, he thanked me and said with a sincere tone that I had given him some things to think about. If I had stayed home…??
On the way home, I stopped by another friend with whom I’ve been sharing. We had a good conversation and he seemed encouraged. He was giving me a ride part way to my next destination as he was picking up his mother-in-law from the hospital. She is very ill. I got to lay hands on her and pray. As I was leaving, I saw a young couple with a very young baby. I felt the urge to pray for the child. I asked permission and did so. As I turned to leave, I felt an overwhelming sense of God’s love. If I had stayed home…??
On Saturday, I got to continue ministry to a young man who is struggling with drugs, alcohol, and violence. He is searching for something to fill his emptiness. Tonight, I am privileged to preach in one of the churches. I am thanking God that He got in the boat and calmed the storm. I had started to sink because I took my eyes off of the One who is my source.
I am looking forward to seeing family and many friends next week.
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