Hard Choices

Life! Sometimes it is like riding a high-speed rollercoaster in the dark. It can be a thrilling and exciting ride or it can be a terrifying experience. Sometimes the journey takes unexpected turns and sometimes the bottom seems to drop out before it goes back up. As little Much Afraid learned in Hinds’ Feet on High Places[1], it doesn’t always follow the path we would choose.

As much as we would like it to be otherwise, most of life is beyond our control. In reality, about the only thing that we are able to control is our reaction and response to the circumstances which life throws at us. And we have been given the freedom to make choices, countless choices every day about how we live. Many of them are conscious choices. Many are not. Either way, we will deal with the consequences, good or bad, of those choices.

In an isolated world, solely our choices and the forces of nature would govern our lives. Nevertheless, as much as we would like to be in control of our own lives, we live in a world populated by other people. Not only do they want to be in control of their own lives, sometimes they want to control ours as well. Very often, it happens that we wind up reaping the consequences of someone else’s choices. It is not always fair.

There will be disappointments and sorrows in life and there will be pain and suffering. These can be either friends and guides which help to lead us forward or they will be enemies which destroy us. We can choose to allow them to build and strengthen our faith and trust in God or we can choose to allow them to destroy us with bitterness and hatred.

As it did for little Much Afraid, the path will not always lead in the direction we would choose. At times, it will seem to lead away from where we believe it should go. This is my position now. I do not want to leave Mexico at this time. I have friends here and I will miss them. There is more ministry opportunity here than three of me could handle. I like it here. I love the people, the food, the climate and the beauty of nature. I can choose to stay. It is my right. However, is it right? It comes down to a question of trust. I can chose to follow the Great Shepherd and to trust Him by doing things His way or I can choose to follow my own way.

At this time, I believe that returning home is the right thing to do. All that remains is to determine the timing. In the natural world, it doesn’t look promising. I am returning at age 61 to no job in a poor economy with nothing to fall back on. However, I also know that none of this came as a surprise to God. I believe that He has already provided the solutions. I expect to be able to give a significant testimony to His goodness when this is settled.  

 Life is an interesting journey. I am sad over what is happening but I am also excited because I am trusting God to be faithful to His promises. I am excited to see how this plays out. The difference between trusting God and trusting self is what determines whether the ride is exciting or terrifying. I prefer exciting.

(If you have never read Hinds' Feet, I highly recommend it. The principles taught have helped me many times in my life.)

---

[1] Hinds’ Feet on High Places – Hannah Hurnard

Another Good Week

This past week was about as routine as routine could be expected here. There were only a few surprises. All of my English class obligations were met and I was blessed to be able to restart classes with the doctor at the Red Cross. The new “phrases only” class at the union hall was a lot of fun.

It was warm and sunny every day with a nice breeze. Sorry!! Be consoled though, I didn’t make it to the beach again. I didn’t get this posted on Sunday as usual because I got home from morning service and felt the need for a nap. I didn’t wake up until it was almost time to head back to town for the evening service.

I was able to make it to church services five times this week between four different churches. I preached for the second week in a row at the Sunday night service in pastor Solomón’s church. It was a bit of a challenge because Arturo, my faithful translator, was not able to make it at the last minute. I had to deliver the message entirely in Spanish. I was thankful that something had moved me to run through the translation several times. I stumbled only a couple of times over longer words. Spanish is easier to get right because every letter in a word (except h) makes a sound and almost all letters have only one sound. My Spanish is getting better thanks to not having too many English speakers to engage in conversation.

I asked the congregation several times during the message if they were still with me. They said they were. I seemed to have their close attention. I think it was because they had to be paying attention to be able to follow my Spanish. I was also delivering a message that might have seemed a bit contrary to what they usually hear. I was telling them to stop trying to be obedient. Legalistic thinking is deeply rooted here. Or maybe it is just more transparent and less sugar-coated than back home.

I wanted to make the point that grace and law do not mix. You cannot patch the law with grace and you cannot contain the new wine of grace within the constraints of the law. The New Covenant did not arise to repair or supplement the Old Covenant. It came as a replacement. I told them to stop wasting their effort trying to be obedient and to start using it to love Jesus. If we love Jesus, we will be obedient because of that love rather than out of obligation. It works!

This week promises to be a busy one. I am going to a mission on Wednesday with the pastors from Monte de Dios, the recovery ministry. Thursday is a pastor’s conference. I have a meal invite for Friday and on Sunday, I will be going in the morning to a mission with another small church which is near my apartment. Tuesday night, Wednesday night and Thursday night services plus the regular classes should ward off any boredom.

Since it now looks certain that Donna will not be returning to Mexico, I will have to leave as well. Besides the fact that it would not be right for us to be separated, such an arrangement would not play well in the culture here. Although those closest to me here understand the situation and are urging me to stay, the best thing will be to come home. I will be looking for employment. I really want to continue in ministry, but I am trusting in God for both guidance and provision. I am daily seeking God’s will in the matter and I would appreciate your prayers.

What's to eat?

How much can one person eat? I might be on my way (unwillingly) to finding out. Since Donna has been back in the States, I have been invited numerous times for meals. I think I have forgotten what hunger feels like. One particular day this past week, I had breakfast, lunch twice and dinner.

I am not complaining by any means. In the first place, it is heartwarming to know that so many people genuinely care. The friends who have become a part of my life will make leaving a very sad time. A piece of my heart will remain here with them.

I am also not complaining because I love the food here. Oaxaca-style is the best. I’m sure there must have been something I didn’t like, but I can’t remember what it was. As long as it contains the Mexican vitamin, Vitamin “T” I’m all for it. For those not familiar with vitamin T, it is Tortillas, Tacos, Tlyudas, Tostadas, Tamales, Tortas and Totopos. Add some fresh hot salsa, a pitcher of Jamaica (hibiscus) water and I am all set. Also, the Mole (mo-lay), a type of gravy, is incredible and the seafood is the best. HMMMM? Is that hunger I feel?

I never found the time to be bored this week. I went to church four times throughout the week and preached for the first time in Spanish without a translator at one of the services. I only stumbled a couple of times.

I didn’t make it to the beach again, but I did spend a lot of time in the main town park. It is a great way to connect with people and it is a very pleasant environment for reading and studying. I have been spending as little time as possible alone in the apartment. Although I know a lot of people and spend a lot of time with them, it is not the same as being with those closest to you.

My ribs are still very sore. I wound up getting two cortisone shots at the Red Cross. It seemed to help a lot except that it seemed to make me retain water for a few days. I looked the medication up on the internet. I’m not sure, but it looks like it is approved only for veterinary use in the US. That may explain my urge to horse around and sleep standing up.

I am preaching tonight (Sunday) on the topic of submission. I think that submitting is a very difficult thing to do. We all naturally resist being under authority. It is against our (old for Christians) nature. Another word for submission is obedience. Obedience is God’s umbrella of protection. God’s blessings reside under it.

The opposite of submission is rebellion. Another word for rebellion is sin. We rebel against submitting to God’s authority in our lives because we fear letting go of control. We need to have faith enough in God to protect and provide for us that we submit to His instructions. The opposite of faith is fear. We are like the guy who lowered himself into a deep well with a rope he thought was long enough but wasn’t. Unable to climb and fearing the result of the fall, he held on until his strength gave out. Losing his grip on the rope, he fell ----- all of six inches. Let go!

Holidays, A Cracked Rib, Fishing, and Iguana for Lunch

          Well, this was one adventure-filled week. I hardly know where to begin. On Monday, I went fishing with my friend Manólo at Playa Chahue next to the marina. We didn’t use either poles or fishing line. We used 200’+ nets, three in all. My job was to swim straight out from shore with the net. It was in a bag on top of an inner tube which I pulled behind me. Manólo followed deploying the net as we went. We finally ran out of net about 100’ past the safety buoy line.

          After all three nets were set, we settled on the rocks for some excellent conversation. When about three hours had passed, we went to work retrieving the nets. By this time, it was very dark except for a partial moon. All of the nets were filled with fish of various sizes. As we were about finished, I slipped on the rocks and took a sharp blow to my left rib cage. It hurt some, but except for a skinned elbow, there seemed to be no other injury. I thank God that the foot which had slipped into a crevice in the rocks was uninjured. More on this in a minute.

          The next step was getting the fish-laden net bags to the pickup truck and then home. Once there, we set about to remove the fish from the nets. I always thought that you just dumped them to the floor. Hah!!! Each fish had to be individually disentangled. This was no easy task. As they struggle to free themselves, they become thoroughly stuck in the net. As we worked, his wife was busy preparing some of the catch for dinner. De-e-elicious!!!

          The ribs were sore, but I figured it was worth the adventure. It didn’t bother me too much (only when I breathed) until sometime in the middle of the night Friday night. One time when I turned over, I felt a sharp snap followed by an intense pain which did not go away. I went to the Red Cross to see a doctor on Saturday. He examined me, gave me an anti-inflammatory shot and a box of Naproxen. Diagnosis - “probably cracked” rib. The total cost was less than 200 pesos. That is around $14.50. It would have been thousands in the US. I’ll be hurting for awhile. {Insert violin music here}

          Thursday, I was invited to a friend’s house for lunch. On the menu – Iguana. That’s right. I ate Lenny! Well, maybe it wasn’t Lenny, but it was of his relatives. No, it didn't taste at all like chicken. It was quite good actually. The texture was slightly chewy and the flavor was distinctive but good. Wednesday I had partaken of another very traditional, but forbidden local delicacy which must remain unnamed. Chapulines is yet another treat. They are seasoned, fried grasshoppers. They are very tasty, kind of like barbecue potato chips. You just have to pull the legs off the juicy big ones or they get stuck in your throat. The only "bucket list” food left on my list is Tacos de Ojos. (cow eye taco)

          Friday was “El Dia de Reyes” (Three Kings Day). It is the culmination of the Christmas celebration and it is a big holiday. It, rather than Christmas Day, is the big gift-giving day in honor of the gifts brought by the three wise men. One particular custom is the Rosca de Reyes, or King’s Cake. It is round like a crown, but looks like a giant decorated bagel. Hidden inside is a tiny Jesus figure. The person who gets the figure has to host the February 2^nd Candlemas Day celebration. The day ends with a dinner of corn tamales and hot chocolate.

          The week was very busy with many ongoing ministry opportunities. God also seems to have given me a very effective strategy for ministering to Jehovah’s Witnesses. It really messes up their programmed responses. We look at evidence within their own literature which undermines their belief that the organization is God’s sole mouthpiece in the Earth today. We also look at information in their literature which undermines the credibility of the organization. It is more loving and is much more effective than trying to attack their flawed (and ever-changing) doctrines. They are too well trained. They are wonderful people. I hesitate to say it, but they put most Christians to shame with the lives they live.

2011 Ends in Huatulco

Somebody help me. I’m going to get fat! I have lost count of how many times I have been invited to share a meal with someone since Donna left two weeks ago. I’m not complaining because I love the fellowship, but I am forgetting what hunger feels like. I really like the food, but full has become the new normal.

          This past week seemed to just fly by. I had numerous “unplanned” opportunities to share the Gospel, answer questions, and otherwise engage people. I use a method I call “planned spontaneity.” I didn’t invent it, but I have found it to be a very effective way to work. Obviously, planning something and being spontaneous are opposites. The idea is to plan to be alert for opportunities to react spontaneously to open doors. I used to use it as a leadership tool. It is very effective. You just need to train yourself to be expectant and ready to react. This past week was very fruitful.

          The past two weeks have seen the town be very busy with tourists. Mexicans seem to have different vacation customs. They vacation as an extended family. You will often see the grand parents, parents, children of all ages and sometimes aunts and uncles and cousins together. They travel in packs. Or should I say parades. (herds?) A typical group will be walking in town in the evening led by or followed by a very cranky looking dad. (Maybe because he’s paying). The women are talking and usually holding hands as the children run to and fro. The teenagers (if there is more than one) stay just far enough apart from the group so as not to seem to be associated with them. It is interesting to watch. I was too busy to set aside any beach time this week. I would not have enjoyed it anyway because they are beyond crowded.

          I did discover why you are having warmer weather up there right now. One evening I met Jack Frost and his wife Jane. They are vacationing here for the holidays. He is looking forward to returning to work. He said something about having a lot of catching up to do. The weather is very nice here, but it is getting very chilly at night. It has been getting down into the 60’s. Jack?

          I spend New Years Eve in church. I was supposed to preach and I had prepared a nice short message on thanksgiving which I was going to deliver without a translator. I haven’t done that yet. The focus of the evening was to be the meal and fellowship. A pastor friend of Pastor Solomón from the City of Oaxaca showed up unexpectedly and Solomón offered to let him share. Ninety (90) lon-n-ng minutes later, he finished his message. Sadly, most of the people left before the meal because it had gotten so late. This is a custom I call preaching the 3 R’s- Rambling, Ranting and Repeating. It is often delivered without any notes which might restrict the speaker to a more focused message. I fear that it turns more people off to God than it helps.

A Different Christmas

            This was a Christmas to remember. Traditions here are a little different. Christmas Eve is the big day and activities are centered around the Christmas Cena (Dinner) which is eaten after 9 PM. Often, the meals are elaborate. Mine was simple pasole con pollo eaten with friend Juan and his family in their tiny apartment. Pasole or pazole is a traditional type of greasy stew dating back thousands of years. It is made with corn (hominy) vegetables and meat. You dress your bowl with chopped cabbage, sliced radishes, chopped onions, cilantro and hot peppers to taste. The typical meat is pork, but I have eaten it with chicken (pollo), beef, tripe (chopped stomach, intestines, etc) and “con sangre” which is essentially boiled blood. That one was a challenge. I will miss the food here. Oaxaqueño (Oaxaca-style) food isn’t common in the Midwest.

Before dinner, I joined Juan and his family and attended the Christmas Eve mass at the Catholic Church. The house was packed wall to wall with worshipers. I was expecting the service to begin with a solemn hymn. I almost fell over when the priest led the procession up the aisle to the tune of Jingle Bells. I am sure there must be more appropriate words to their version of the song, but the words “jingle all the way” are quite permanently burned into my psyche.  

The steps of the altar were covered by baby Jesus statues. People brought them for the service. Many keep a permanent display in their homes. The church itself is dedicated to the virgin Guadalupe. There are numerous depictions of her on the walls. The ceiling contains what is claimed to be the largest painting in existence of her. It is a beautiful church.

Christmas day was anti-climatic. Things seemed very quiet. I spent an enjoyable day with other good friends at the house of Arturo. It will be a bittersweet memory. Although I enjoyed time spent with friends, the time was tainted by the knowledge that I soon may have to say good bye.  

This past week seemed like a month. I was kept busy and was blessed by several significant encounters and breakthroughs with people. It was very encouraging, but indicators seem to be pointing to my following Donna home sooner than later. I am keeping commitments already made and being cautious about making new ones I would only have to break soon. Leaving the friends I already have is going to be tough enough. 

Over the next several weeks, I’ll be looking at my options and considering what the next steps should be. There are lots of logistical issues to work out if I am to come home. Staying here for a longer-term presents another whole set of challenges. In the meantime, I am keeping productively busy and avoiding isolating.

EXTRA! EXTRA! Read all about it!

This is was difficult blog post to write. Last week, Donna and I were looking forward to Christmas and New Year celebrations with each other and friends. On Friday, we used part of our day off to go the beach. We took a photo for our electronic Christmas card. The weather was great. The water was great. It was all good.

On Saturday, a recent and very difficult family situation took a turn for the worst. We quickly determined that it was necessary for Donna to return to the US as soon as possible so that she would be able to deal with it face to face rather than over the telephone and internet.

The plane ticket was purchased on Sunday morning and Donna was on a flight out of Mexico Monday afternoon. She will not likely be able to return until at least September, if ever. She was able to say good-bye to some of our friends. The rest will be very disappointed when I am able to catch up with them. I will be here solo until we sort out the next steps. Here is your opportunity to feel sorry for me. I’ll be here by myself for Christmas. Actually, don’t. I have plenty to keep me busy and good friends to keep me company.

Fortunately, due to sparse financial support from home, we had already been exploring our options in different scenarios. We have been living on my small pension and a little savings we had put together before coming here. We are getting very low on funds. Since we will now be splitting my pension between us, I may be forced to return as well within about two months. Donna will be looking for work to cover the balance of her living expenses and I will become very resourceful until it is time to leave if that is what will be. There will be a great testimony of God’s goodness no matter how this turns out.

We are thanking God for the sense of peace that He is giving us in our knowledge that He is in control and that we are in His capable hands. One of my favorite parts of the Bible is the book of Psalms. Recently I read Psalm 46.  Verses 1-3 say this, “God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore, we will not fear, though the earth should change and though the mountains slip into the heart of the sea; though its waters roar and foam, though the mountains quake at its swelling pride.”  

There is more sadness and disappointment in the thought of leaving than I can describe. This has become a fruitful work and we have made some good friends. We can see so much more that could be accomplished. But I also have the thought that it is possible that if we were to remain, we would somehow stifle the small work which God has begun through us. Lives have been impacted and seeds have been planted. God is more than able to spark a purely indigenous work free of the influence and interference of a crazy type-A gringo.

This situation illustrates how quickly the unexpected can drastically interrupt and alter the course of our lives. With the sudden loss of a loved one or the unexpected loss of a job, we can be thrown into a tailspin from which we have difficulty recovering. Disasters usually come without much warning and our lives are never the same again. How good it is to know that no matter what comes our way, we can know that we are in God’s hands and nothing can snatch us away.  If you aren’t sure, ask me how you can be.

'Twas the Week Before Christmas. Plenty of Creatures!

'Twas the week before Christmas and all through the house, creatures were stirring and none were a mouse. Spiders, scorpions and ants galore. Watch where you step, there's one on the floor. Iguanas and lizards right out the door. Who in their right mind wouldn't ask for more.

They have been putting a second story on a house in our neighborhood. Friday was the day they poured the roof. Almost all houses here are totally bricks, concrete and rebar including the roofs. This particular roof required 87 bags of cement at 50 lbs each (4,350 lbs) plus the aggregate (gravel), sand and the water used to mix it.

Heavy equipment consists of a gas-powered mixer and 5 gallon buckets filled with wet concrete. About 15 men, who form a bucket brigade, carry the filled buckets up a crude wooden ramp to what will be the second floor roof. The bucket is dumped and the man goes back down to get another. This process continues until the house has a roof. It is an interesting illustration of teamwork, hard work and persistence. Each individual bucket is insignificant to the total, but bucket by bucket the work is completed.

I don't like to share much of other peoples' business in the blog. I don't want to use them and their lives for self-promotion. However, this victory I feel led to share because it promotes God. The mother of someone we know was recently hospitalized with an abcessed kidney infection. She is also diabetic. Her blood sugar was way out of wack as well. She had been on intraveneous antibiotics. They decided to discharge her despite the persisting infection and the blood issues. The family was expecting a funeral. I had the opportunity to pray with her just as she was being discharged. She is a Christian and I know that others in her church were praying for her as well. Today, she is well. God healed her against medical reason. She should not have recovered.

As I was writing this, Donna felt something crawling up her leg. As you can imagine, it is a common occurrance because there are so many insects here. Ants of all colors and sizes are the most common. We also have to deal with tiny gnats which are almost too small to see. They love to feed on humans, especially Donna. They leave an itchy welt. This morning however, what she brushed from her leg to the floor was a scorpion about 1/16" long. It quickly met the end of my right index finger. It did not survive. Time to get out the bug spray!

Next week is the run up to Christmas. Neither of us feel the holiday spirit. The weather is Chicago-summer warm. Although some people do decorate a little and Christmas stuff has been in the stores for a month, it is not even a shadow of Christmas in the US. In a way, it is a bit of a blessing. We are missing the festive get togethers and food plus things like my son Jason's fudge, daughter Jessica's cookies and, most of all, spending time with family.

We had two invitations from friends for Christmas. We did not want to have to choose. We were relieved to find out that one was for Christmas Eve. Whew!! We accepted both. Then we discovered that the other was Eve as well. We have since learned that "Christmas" means Christmas Eve. Gaahhhh!!!!!! Christmas Day is for sleeping in and recovering from an over the top medianoche (midnight) dinner. I think we'll go to the beach.

The Legends of the Virgins

T

his was an important holiday week in Mexico. December 8^th is the feast day or holy day (day of special honor for a saint for all of you non-Catholics out there) for the Virgin Juquila. “She” is a statue believed to have miraculous powers. There are different versions of the legend about her origins. She is mostly a regional icon here. People are known to crawl for miles on a dirt road as they approach her to make their promises and requests.

Today, December 12^th, is the big day honoring the national patroness, the Virgin Guadalupe. She also holds a very high Catholic-religious significance. Legend says that she appeared one day in 1531 to an indigenous peasant near Mexico City. She instructed him to build a church on the spot in her honor. When he told the bishop, the bishop required proof. When the peasant returned with the requested “proof,” an image of her was miraculously produced on a piece of cloth. Today, the image is in the most visited Catholic shrine in the world. The image is worshipped and many miracles are attributed to it.

Celebrations are held throughout Mexico. Our town is filled with people celebrating with parades, music, fireworks (which are launched from right within the crowd) and all sorts of other festive activities. Some say that it is a bigger celebration than Christmas. We’ll see.

Last night, I was privileged to share a message with the congregation at Pastor Salomón’s church out of the book of Judges chapters 6 and 7. I spoke about God’s commission to us and His power and ability to fulfill the mission through us in spite of our inabilities and fears. I was a little surprised that when I referred to Gideon’s fleece test in the story that many, if not most of the people had no idea what it was. Aurturo, my faithful translator, had to relate the account to them. I hadn’t made the telling of it a formal part of the message. I assumed it would be familiar. Wrong assumption! More Bible teaching is needed!

It is no wonder that the Jehovah’s Witnesses are so successful when they speak authoritatively about what (their interpretation) the Bible says. JW doctrines play very well into many of the cultural religious beliefs here. If people have little or no knowledge of what the Bible says, they will easily be misled. No longer will I assume that even commonly familiar stories are known. I strongly suspect that not very many people here actually read their Bibles. Part of the reason is education or lack of it. A big part of the reason is that the accepted Bible translation is the Reina Valera which can be a bit difficult to understand. I am reluctant to accept that a part of the problem might actually be a lack of teaching. We have been introducing people to a Spanish version of the New Living Translation which is much easier to understand.

I was invited to make a 10-day missions trip to minister in the mountains next week. I would have really loved to go. I was compelled to decline. I have had to face the reality that my body is getting older. I turned 61 this week. I am no longer up the rigor of walking uphill for several hours. It is beyond my ability. A man’s got to know his limitations. I can walk all day on the flat. Steep uphills are a different matter altogether. I have to rest and catch my breath at least once during the short climb (1/2 mile) up when I go to Monte de Dios. Besides, it would have meant leaving Donna alone. That is something I was not willing to do.

As the Christmas holiday approaches, we are expecting to have to deal with a whole lot more downtime as people get busy with their preparations and festivities. Although the intensity of activity does not even approach what you are experiencing, there are still a lot of distractions. Even so, we don’t feel at all like it is Christmas time. Perhaps the weather, which continues to be nice is part of the reason.  

Missing Students and Uninvited Guests

O

ur first week back in Huatulco was a bit sad and a little frustrating. On Monday, Benabe, our morning taxi driver student didn’t show up. When we saw him the next day on the street, he said that he thought we wouldn’t be back until after Christmas. We had made our return date very clear, but it didn’t register. Information like that doesn’t stick with people here. We got a similar response from a few others. He failed to show Wednesday as well, but he had a lucrative fare to another town. We have agreed that business takes precedence over class.

The Monday family also missed. The dad, Manólo, did come during the day to tell us that they weren’t coming. Normally, people don’t call or let us know. They just don’t show up. The message he heard me preach Sunday night was about the promises of God using our promise habits as an illustration. It seems he was listening.

Also on Monday, we were greeted by what must have been millions of large ants when we returned from town shortly before sunset. There were 2” wide highways of the things coming and going in every direction, mostly up all sides of the building. There were more ants than sidewalk. It was a scene from a sci-fi horror movie. I immediately knew why something had moved me to buy two cans of bug spray when I did the shopping earlier in the day. Fortunately, the landlord happened by and saw them. It also helped that our downstairs neighbor is very squeamish and couldn’t handle the sight. The landlord came back armed like John Goodman in the movie Arachnophobia and quelled the invasion.  

Tuesday, Carmen, the doctor at the Red Cross, was too busy with patients because she is alone. The nurse had taken another job after 14 years working there. The technician had to leave to attend to some family problems and never returned. They were some of our first and longest-term students. We did have class with Carmen on Thursday, but at the end, she announced that the next day was her last. She is returning to her hometown several hours away. We are sad to tears. She was very special to us. 

Wednesday’s only class was with Osvaldo, our 12-year-old young man. Everyone else was “no show.” This left the rest of the day empty. It is very difficult for me to have too much unplanned idle time. I am a type-A who needs to be busy. However, I am amazed how God can take our defects and turn them into something good. Many unhealthy motivations and weaknesses have turned into productive strengths, and He’s not finished yet. I have come a long way, but I still don’t do “nothing” as well as I should unless it is planned.

Friday we made an early trip to a fairly secluded beach. Because the beach is surrounded by cliffs, the only access is either by boat or down a steep and somewhat treacherous path. That is why it is usually empty. Donna slipped on the way down and she wound up with some nasty scrapes on her knee. She also bruised her wrist. We won’t be visiting that beach again! It was my bad for underestimating her ability to negotiate the path. In spite of the mishap, we did get to do a lot of reading and I was blessed with the outline of an awesome message.

Saturday morning we enjoyed the company of our excellent friends Art and Betty for breakfast in our apartment. That was great. The rest of the day was spent at home doing message prep, studying and writing this post. We had made plans, but Donna needed a day to recuperate and heal. We also had an unexpected, but great visit with our friend Antonio on Saturday evening.

Back "Home"

We arrived safely Saturday night after a mostly uneventful trip. This is remarkable considering the normal level of adventure in our lives since we came to Mexico. Our time in the States was very enjoyable save for a couple of bumps. We loved seeing as many family members and friends as we did. We really wanted to see more people and spend more time with those we saw. As good as it is to visit, it seems to take a few days to get over a little homesickness when we return here.

One bit of excitement was having our car towed from in front of daughter Camille's apartment. There were no signs or markings. After the shock of finding our car missing, a night on Camille's livingroom floor, a trip in the morning from Woodstock to Crystal Lake and $150, we got the car back. It was supposed to be $200, but the guy gave us a break on the 10 hours of "storage fee".

It caused me to miss my one opportunity to spend the early Saturday morning hours with my friends at the Rockford First men's prayer group. I was looking forward to coffee and a long john too! It did result in a big blessing as the guys spontaneously reached into their pockets. They blessed us with more than double our loss for the towing. God is good!! (I'd rather have had the fellowship)

We are ready to hit the ground running. Our full schedule resumes immediately beginning with preaching at Pastor Solomón's church tonight. We'll see what the rest of the week brings. We have prospects for 3-5 new students.

We have found that teaching English is a very effective way to reach people and to build relationships with them. This leads to many opportunities to share the Gospel. For a number of reasons, we don't charge for the classes. In some ways, it feels as though we have accomplished nothing in the nine months we've been here. But as we look back, we can see that we have had a huge positive impact on a significant number of people.

We would like to continue, but we need to ask for your help. We came to Mexico on faith with a small amount of savings and a monthly pension I receive from my days as a police officer. As I write this, we are about 3-4 months from depleting our savings. When the money runs out, we will have to return home. Although I really want to remain here, we are both very willing to return to the States if that is God's will. We were and we are trusting God to supply our need either way. Please consider prayerfully and carefully whether you might be able to help us with a one-time gift or regular monthly support. We need to raise about $600 per month.  We are very thankful to those who have been generous to help us get this far.

BLOG COMMENT POSTS   Serveral people have told me that they posted comments to the blog. Unfortunately, we have not seen most of them. I checked the settings and confirmed that anybody is allowed to post a comment. I believe the problem is a checkbox which is under the comment box. It says "Select Profile" You must answer this box for the comment to appear. You may select either "Anonymous" or "Name/URL". Just type your name in the box. It will attach your name to the comment and we will know who posted it. It was disappointing to learn that we haven't seen some of your comments. It is very encouraging to us to know that you are taking an interest in our activities.

TRUE CONFESSIONS

Normally, we try to keep this on a lighter tone and try to give a small taste of what we are experiencing. We do not want to share a lot of the nitty gritty of ministry because those things are very personal to the people involved. We want to respect their privacy. However, sometimes I feel the need to share a bit of the personal side of life away from home. This one is a bit of confession and hopefully, encouragement.

The past week was my most difficult in Huatulco to date. Monday and Tuesday were holidays for the celebration of Los Dias de los Muertos. (Day(s) of the Dead) It is a huge holiday commemorating the dead. Sacrifices consisting of the favorite foods, treats, and alcohol of the dead relative are placed on an altar with many flowers and candles to guide and welcome them. There are many rituals and traditions dating back thousands of years. It is generally taken very seriously.

Because of the celebrations, most of my English students had cancelled for the week or just did not call or show up. To be fair, this is the common custom in Mexico. Rarely will you receive a call that someone will be very late or not coming at all. Normally, we take it in stride, but this week it frustrated me. I wasted a lot of time waiting. Monday was mostly a wash except for a very pleasant evening with a young couple from down the street.

Tuesday, I arrived on time for the usual pre-class breakfast at the Red Cross. The doctor, Carmen, met me at the front desk and explained that she was the only one there so she would not be able to be in class. Bummer! I was hungry too. The hotel union was cancelled, so I headed home. I already knew in advance that my Wednesday, in-town classes were cancelled. Add to the list a string of drops, spills, breaks, and mishaps and by evening, I was feeling pretty sorry for myself. Even watching one of my favorite movies, Music Man (Shirley Jones version) didn’t help.

I woke up Wednesday with a bad attitude. I didn’t even shower, shave, or brush my teeth. Pity party doesn’t begin to describe it. My motivation meter was below zero. However, I managed to think just about every negative thought you could imagine. We don’t belong here. We are wasting our time and money being here. We’re not making any difference. I’m not capable or qualified to be doing this. It was an ugly day during which I stayed home (isolated) stirring the pot with both hands. I am glad I neither had any food in the house (by choice) nor felt like going out and facing people. I might have tried to eat myself to happiness. As I write about it now, it doesn’t seem real. I have a good friend here who will scold me when he reads this. I deserve it. The last thing an person in a pity party should do (and the first thing he does) is isolate.

Thursday looked to be more of the same. Fortunately, my daily reading of the Proverbs gave me a sharp wrap on the knuckles. Prov 3:5-6 is my life-guidance, foundational passage. “Trust in the Lord...” Oswald Chambers challenged me even further. In retrospect, I know that it was the Holy Spirit speaking to me when the thought entered my head that I needed to visit a man I haven’t seen in a while. I really didn’t want to go, but I knew I needed to be obedient. I argued with myself to turn back all of the way there.

He is a long-time addict who struggles to stay clean. He has accepted Christ, but guilt and condemnation are still his constant companions. He revealed that he had recently relapsed. He had stopped, but he was still beside himself with shame. As I ministered to him, a boulder dropped out of the sky and landed on my head. I suddenly and clearly realized that, although I was counseling him about his situation, God was counseling me about mine. I have no doubt that God wanted to use me to minister to this man, but He also was using my obedience to minister to me. If I had stayed home….??  God is in control, but He works through our submission.

Friday morning began with a fresh attitude. I had a class at the Red Cross with the doctor. I was able to share more of my personal testimony with her. Afterwards, I went to the town square park to read my Bible. Two young men stopped to talk. They were Jehovah’s Witnesses. One of them was born into it. Normally, they are nearly impossible to reason with. Their training prepares them for virtually every argument using the Bible. However, we had an excellent conversation about the organization. At different points, I felt that he was being touched, that his armor was being pierced. When we finished, he thanked me and said with a sincere tone that I had given him some things to think about. If I had stayed home…??

On the way home, I stopped by another friend with whom I’ve been sharing. We had a good conversation and he seemed encouraged. He was giving me a ride part way to my next destination as he was picking up his mother-in-law from the hospital. She is very ill. I got to lay hands on her and pray. As I was leaving, I saw a young couple with a very young baby. I felt the urge to pray for the child. I asked permission and did so. As I turned to leave, I felt an overwhelming sense of God’s love. If I had stayed home…??

On Saturday, I got to continue ministry to a young man who is struggling with drugs, alcohol, and violence. He is searching for something to fill his emptiness. Tonight, I am privileged to preach in one of the churches. I am thanking God that He got in the boat and calmed the storm. I had started to sink because I took my eyes off of the One who is my source.

I am looking forward to seeing family and many friends next week.